DID NOT START.
As much as I’m ashamed to say it, I did not run the Richmond half or full marathon.
There was no physical reason for it.
I just didn’t feel like it. There is no acceptable excuse for it. There’s not really any reason for me not wanting to do it. I could have done it. I could have finished. But I didn’t even attempt to start.
Sometimes, I feel like not starting is worse than quitting half-way through because not starting means you’ve already given up, that you’re already out of the game.
I’ve had a hard time prioritizing my life lately. On the one hand, I want to be super healthy and extremely fit. I want to run my races, complete marathons, train for triathlons.
On the other hand, I don’t have the luxury of time. (Yes, busy people make time, I know this.)
When I started my healthy living journey back in February, I lived in a vacuum, a bubble, my own little world. I lived at home. I did not have to have a job. I had all the time in the world to cook, take photos, exercise, train.
I didn’t have to learn how to prioritize.
I did not have to choose between sparing time for studying, training, cooking, or friendship. The only factor I was concerned about was my health. And I was successful.
But now, I’m trying to balance having a healthy relationship with not only my body but with school, my classmates, and my friends. I want to have a social life, but I also need to aim for overall health.
And it’s been difficult.
I have not allotted myself enough time to consistently run and diligently train. I haven’t had the mental stamina required to finish.
Sadly, I haven’t even made the priority to start. And I hate missing races.
For me, not starting is a big slap in the face. I feel like I’ve regressed back to my old habits, and I know I haven’t, but having a race planned and registered for is a lot of stress and pressure.
I can’t even find one reasonable, legit excuse for not running.
Plain and simple: I just didn’t want to do it.
Sometimes, I feel like I’ve given up, and I need to constantly remind myself that I’m tired. I’m still making conscious decisions, it’s just that my life isn’t only about healthy living, exercise and training any more.
There’s one thing I do want to promise myself though: to never have another Did Not Start.
Have you ever not started something that you had planned to do?
What was your reason?














